Many management problems stem from poor communication – mostly from poor listening.
Many problems in collaboration and leadership have to do with communication – and often with poor listening. There is no exact figure for this; what is well documented is that good listening goes hand in hand with better relationships and higher performance.
The quality in detail
Four steps through the quality: understand, check, connect, apply. Open any topic to read more.
The core messageWhat the quality means – and what it doesn’t
Many leadership problems arise because people don’t really listen. If you listen attentively and with understanding, you spot problems earlier and gain trust.
- It does not mean
- That listening means waiting quietly until it’s your turn to talk. Real listening seeks to understand, not just to reply.
- That you have to agree with everything you hear. You can listen well and still decide differently – as long as you explain why.
- Strictly speaking
- It deliberately names no figure: the often-quoted “60 percent” has no traceable primary source. The core holds without it: it is well established that perceived listening goes along with better relationships and higher performance.
- What matters is whether others feel heard, not whether you consider yourself a good listener. A leader’s good listening goes along with less exhaustion and a lower intention to quit – it does not follow that it solves most problems.
- Applies to
- Every conversation: in one-on-ones and team meetings, among colleagues, in pastoral care and on a club board, at the kitchen table with your partner and children.
The explanationFour kinds of listening: “I see” listening is merely a prelude to speaking yourself.
Four kinds of listening: “I see” listening is merely a prelude to speaking yourself.
Attentive listening signals attention through gestures and sounds.
Paraphrasing listening restates what was said in your own words to avoid misunderstandings. Empathic listening also grasps feelings and needs.
The signs3 signs the quality is present · 3 that it is missing
- In conversation, you sum up in your own words what you heard before you respond.
- People bring you bad news early because they know you will listen.
- You ask about feelings and needs, not just facts.
- You often interrupt or have your answer ready before the other person has finished.
- You only learn about conflicts once they break out in the open – all the more when they arise several levels away from you.
- Staff, volunteers, or children say: “With you, I can’t get a word in.”
The research4 sources: 2 primary studies, 1 review, 1 meta-analysis · 2015–2024 · with the limits of the research
- low
- moderate
- high
High – Perceived listening by leaders.
- 2015Karina J. Lloyd et al.
Leader listening is associated with lower exhaustion and lower turnover intention.
- 2017Guy Itzchakov, Avraham N. Kluger & Dotan R. Castro
Good listening lowers social anxiety and makes attitudes more nuanced.
- 2022Avraham N. Kluger & Guy Itzchakov
Listening affects performance, leadership, relationships and well-being at work.
The effect of listening is supported by meta-analysis. The “60 percent” figure has no traceable primary source and should not be cited as a finding.
The originJohn C. Maxwell · “Listening”
- 1999OriginJohn C. Maxwell
The 21 Indispensable Qualities of a Leader, Quality 11
- ListeningIn essence: To reach people’s hearts, you first have to listen to them.
- todayWEGVISOR: Listening
The WEGVISOR version of the quality of Listening takes up Maxwell’s idea in the core statement “Many management problems stem from poor communication – mostly from poor listening” and drops the often-quoted “60 percent” figure, which has no traceable primary source. The effect of good listening itself, by contrast, is well supported by meta-analysis.
The related qualities and lawsQ04 Communication · L10 Connection · L11 Inner Circle · Q16 Responsibility
Listening is the other half of communication. Only when you have understood can you simplify complicated things so they get through.
Listening touches the heart. Feeling heard is often the first step toward real connection.
Your inner circle only helps you if you listen to it. If you tune out disagreement, you soon surround yourself with yes-sayers.
Responsibility begins with listening: you can only stand up for people whose situation and concerns you truly know.
The action points5 stages of growth – from first awareness to passing it on
- Become aware In your next conversation, just notice how often you interrupt or are already preparing your reply while the other person is still speaking. Don't change anything yet.
- Lay the foundations This week, have one conversation in which you don't interrupt and at the end repeat in your own words what you heard before adding anything yourself.
- Make it a habit In every important conversation, ask at least one follow-up question about what matters to the other person or how they feel about it before you give your own view.
- Deepen deliberately This week, ask someone you work closely with for critical feedback on you, listen without justifying yourself, restate it in your own words, and visibly act on one point from it.
- Pass it on In a group you lead or regularly help shape – a team, project or committee – propose the rule that contested points are first restated in one’s own words before anyone disagrees, and ask once a month whether everyone feels heard.
The reflection questions5 questions for you or a conversation with others
- When did I last listen to someone without already forming my answer in my head?
- Who around me feels unheard by me?
- What bad news could I have learned earlier if I had listened better?
- Do I listen as attentively to feelings and needs as I do to facts?
- How do I invite disagreement instead of fending it off – including from people who work several levels away from me?
Take your time with one question. Write down your answer – or talk it over with someone you trust.
The picture to rememberWaves travel from left to right. Whoever listens takes them in completely.
- Waves travel from left to right.
- Whoever listens takes them in completely.
What listening looks like in practice
The emperor who listened to his advisers
In times of crisis and war, Marcus Aurelius sought his advisers’ counsel, weighed their arguments and tried to understand the people’s hardships. He never thought himself infallible – his Meditations bear witness to that humility.
Do you listen with one ear or four?
According to Friedemann Schulz von Thun, every message carries four things: factual content, self-disclosure, relationship and appeal. Listen only to the facts and you miss what people reveal about themselves and what they actually want from you.
The philosopher who led with questions
Socrates began every dialogue with questions, listened patiently without judging too soon and followed up precisely – until his partners reached insight on their own. His words “I know that I know nothing” show the humility behind it.
